This day is a bit of a mixed bag for me, like lots of people who’ve lost their dads for one reason or another. I lost my dad about 18 years ago but he didn’t die. I lost him to mental illness and addiction. He’s still alive, somewhere, but he’s not the dad I remember from my childhood. The funny and charming man who would talk to anybody about anything. The man who knew more about Eric Clapton than was probably healthy & did a mean air guitar to the blues. The last time I saw him he was literally a shell of his former self. So much so that it’s too difficult to put into words here.
My sister & I were lucky though – when we were very young my mum married a lovely man who took us in & brought us up as his own. And is still bringing us & our children up. I’m extremely proud of him, proud to be his daughter and to call him “my dad”, although most of my close friends know he’s my step dad.
I’m also lucky that my girls have got a great dad and it brings tears of joy to my eyes to see him wrestling with them or reading to them or taking part in fathers week at school, because those are memories that they will always have & treasure. Memories that I don’t have of my dad.
So hug your dads extra tight today if you’re lucky enough to have them around. Hug them and tell them you love them as often as you can, not just today. And if, like me, this day is tinged with a little (or a lot) of sadness, then remember that it’s actually just another day and it’s only “Fathers Day” because some clever person realised that they’d be able to make some money by calling it that.